Friday, January 30, 2009

Obama's Bailout Plan Explained

Once upon a time a man appeared in a village and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.

The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them. The man bought thousands at $10 and, as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort.

He next announced that he would now buy monkeys at $20 each. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms.

The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so scarce it was an effort to even find a monkey, let alone catch it!

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50 each! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would buy on his behalf. In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers: "Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has already collected. I will sell them to you at $35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each." The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys for 700 billion dollars. They never saw the man or his assistant again, only lots and lots of monkeys!
Now you have a better understanding of how the BAILOUT PLAN WILL WORK !!!!

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Luzerne County Corruption

I would love to tell you that I'm shocked by the revelation of jurist imprudence but alas, that isn't possible. This scandal will not end with just two judges going to prison.

The question I want the media to start asking is; If participant 1 was willing to pay $2.6 million for a contract that guaranteed $1.3 million in placements per year, how much was he or did he pay for the county to sign a $58 million lease for a facility the county could have owned for $9 million? If he did pay for that, who did he pay? I know that answer is completely evident. I wrote before about county employees that were making $42,000 per year joining golf clubs that cost $18k to join and had dues of $4+k per year and wondered how they could afford it. I also wondered how someone making $42k per year could afford a $650,000. home in Wilkes-Barre. Perhaps we will get the answers to these questions.

The Democrat Party has had a stranglehold on virtually all of the public offices in Luzerne County for as long as I can remember. I think that will change come May if the government comes forward with more indictments before then. Care to guess why? You got it in one. Each and every person that is going to go down is either an elected democrat or was appointed by an elected democrat.

The Bush-Effect that galvanized so many people to vote for democrats disheartened me. Perhaps we will see the same type of backlash against the dems here when their massive corruption is finally exposed.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Luzerne County's Finest, Conahan and Ciavarella Plead Guilty

The first of the rats infesting the courthouse are caught and are pleading guilty. I wrote last year that this was coming and am happy that I was right. They are each going to serve 87 months in prison. Granted, it will be a club fed, but prison none the less.

I heard through the grape vine that the next to be pinched will be a certain court administrator that has been on paid leave since August of last year. It seems he accidentally stole a few hundred thousand dollars of confiscated gambling device money. I heard he has been in rehab for an undisclosed addiction. Most likely he was addicted to stupidity.

I am wondering how all the other rats are sleeping these days. You have to bet that Ciavarella and Conahan are dishing the dirt on everybody that is dirty there. If for no other reason than to spread the misery. Certain elected officials that have been granting no-bid contracts come to mind. I truly can't wait!

Friday, January 23, 2009

The British called - They want their guns back!

I hope all Americans can learn a lesson from a populace that allowed their government to disarm them.

Obama's Priorities

We should be thankful that Pres. Obama has taken on another problem today that I am sure affected everybody you know. That's right, he signed an executive order to fund abortions in other countries. I don't know about any of you but this is a huge load off my mind. I mean thank god, whatever would I have done if my tax dollars weren't funding some foreigner's abortion?

Congrats Barry, you saved us all!!!!!!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Obama to Sign Executive Order Closing Guantanomo Bay

It seems my fears of an Obama presidency were completely unfounded. Showing that he is a take charge decision maker, Pres. Obama has decided that the problem that needed his attention first was the detention center at Guantanamo Bay. Yep, I figured that was the problem most affecting me and most people I know. I will now sleep better knowing that we have a president at the helm that knows how to prioritize.

I would've immediately focused on the depression that is gripping this country as well as most of the world but what the hell do I know? Maybe I would've even given some thought to Iraq and Afghanistan before Gitmo.

The question I want answered about the detainees at Gitmo is what do we do with them when we release them? Their native countries have declared that they will not allow them back home. So where do they go? If you guessed America, you are right. That's just fooking beautiful. Way to go Barry, I feel safer already.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Jokes that let you know if you've been married too long

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping the channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started... ==================================================================== ??? My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 Seconds.' I bought her a scale. And then the fight started... ==================================================================== ??? When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace Expensive - so I took her to a gas station... And then the fight started.... =================================================================== ??? My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion,and I kept Staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby Table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend.. I understand she took to Drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she Hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating That long?' And then the fight started... ===========================================================
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to Verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at Home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home And come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That Silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might Have gotten disability, too' And then the fight started..... ==================================================================== ??? A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy With what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, Fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.' And then the fight started. ==================================================================== ??? I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order First."I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you Worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself." And then the fight started.....

Friday, January 16, 2009

Eagles Fans Will Love This Joke

On the first day of school a first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Cowboys fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Cowboys fans.
Wanting to impress their teacher, everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl.
The teacher looks at the girl with surprise, 'Janie, why didn't you raise your hand?'
'Because I'm not a Cowboys fan,' she replied.
The teacher, still shocked, asked, 'Well, if you are not a Cowboys fan, then who are you a fan of?' 'I am an Eagles fan, and proud of it,' Janie replied.
The teacher could not believe her ears. 'Janie, please tell me why you are you an Eagles fan?' 'Because my mom is an Eagles fan, and my dad is an Eagles fan, so I'm an Eagles fan too!' ??? Well,' said the teacher in a obviously annoyed tone, 'that is no reason for you to be an Eagles fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time.
What if your mom were an idiot and your dad were a moron, what would you be then?'
'Then,' Janie smiled, 'I'd be a Cowboys fan.'

Have a great weekend!!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Israel and Hamas

On Tuesday, we apparently had a pro-Hamas rally in downtown Wilkes-Barre. I really wouldn't have known about it except I listened to Corbett on my commute home yesterday. Well, truth be told, it was Corbett and a few hundred terrorist apologists that called in that I listened too.

I am curious as to what Corbett and said apologists think happened over there. Do they think that one day Israel just decided to launch air and ground assaults in Gaza? Israel began prosecuting this campaign after a few thousand rockets were fired at them. What the fook did Hamas think would happen? They must have forgotten that Israel doesn't fight according to world public opinion like America has since Vietnam. I liken Hamas to the little kid that throws rocks at a hornet nest and can't understand why he got stung.

If you listen to the apologists, you'll hear them all say that only a few Israelis were killed or injured. I ask those farktards, do you really think Hamas wouldn't have liked a higher death toll? If those asshats had ever learned how to shoot or had better weapons systems and killed thousands with the thousands of missiles they have fired, would you still be sympathetic? Would Israel's response still seem over the top?

The one basic fact that the apologists/sympathizers always seem to forget is that only one of the belligerents in this conflict has sworn to totally eradicate the other. Hamas has always stated that as their dearest wish, not Israel. Another basic difference between the two is that Israel doesn't store and fire their weapons while surrounded by women and children to insure casualty counts designed to garner world sympathy.

Perhaps we should have Jimmy Carter go give the terrorist leaders a handjob again and see if they settle down or maybe Israel should just wipe them right the fook out and be done with it.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Luzerne County Needs Home Rule

Is anybody else embarrassed by our elected officials? I sure am. It almost seems like they are in a contest to see who can make the dumbest comment to the press. At least I only voted for one of our commissioners.

Home rule will probably fail again as the voters overwhelmingly vote democrat and almost always believe the line of shit that is fed to them by the politicians. Greggy and Toddy shot down home rule last time just by telling people to vote against it. Now Greg says he is willing to listen. I wonder if that's because he knows he won't be re-elected anyway? Petrilla and Urban appear to be trying to right about a century of wrongs but time will tell exactly what they can accomplish.

I think for Home Rule to have any shot, we will need a strong grassroots effort. I am hoping my fellow bloggers, both from the right and the left, will get behind this.

have a great weekend!!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Obama Names Panetta to Head the CIA

Obama is doing his best to prove that he has absolutely no clue what he is doing. He has named Leon Panetta to head the CIA. A man with zero experience in the intelligence world. What he is is a career politician who probably cashed in his chips to get nominated. Even Obama's fellow dems are wondering just what in the hell he is thinking.

Congrats Barry, you haven't even been inaugurated yet and you have already weakened our country. Well done tool.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Transcript of Wiretapped Conversation Between Rahm Emanuel and Blago

I cannot imagine that this whacker is Obama's Chief of Staff. I am not entirely sure this is true but I had to post it any way.


The US Attorney in Chicago, Patrick Fitzgerald, released a wiretapped conversation between Ralm Emmanuel (Obama's Chief of Staff ) and Illinois Governor Rod Blogojevich and it is a doozey!

FBI File #9536B Wiretap on line 312-XXX-XXXX November 10th, 2008 12:42 PM Eastern Time Rush transcript:
RAHM EMANUEL: This is Rahm.
ROD BLAGOJEVICH: Hey Rahm, yeah it's Rod.
EMANUEL: Uh-huh. What's going on governor, I'm busy.
BLAGO: Well, it's about that Senate appointment. ..
EMANUEL: We already gave you the list of people we like.
BLAGO: Yeah, I been looking the list over. Interesting names. Good people. How's the transition going?
EMANUEL: It's going fine, governor. Are you calling to fucking tell me anything, or what, cause I--
BLAGO: No no, I'm just wondering if you have all your picks already made. I heard something about Dashle for HHS--
EMANUEL: I'm not gonna discuss ongoing deliberations, gov, you know that.
Transcript continued:
BLAGO: Hey, come on Rahm, let's not act like I'm a stranger here.
EMANUEL: Did I call you a stranger? If I thought you were a stranger, you think I'd be interrupting my important fucking business to take this fucking phone call?
BLAGO: Hey you don't have to get curt with me, Rahm.
EMANUEL: This isn't me being curt, Gov, this is me being fucking busy. Now what did you call about?
BLAGO: I'm just feeling you out, seeing if Valerie [Jarret] still wants that Senate seat, just wondering what kind of priority that is for the President-Elect.
EMANUEL: Actually, it's not a priority. Valerie's had second thoughts about the job.
BLAGO: What, she doesn't want it anymore?
EMANUEL: She's having second thoughts. You want more details, you ask her.
BLAGO: She won't take my calls.
EMANUEL: Big fucking surprise.
BLAGO: What's that supposed to mean?
EMANUEL: Um, I don't know, what's it supposed to mean governor? A.) You're a fucking crook. B.) You're a fucking asshole. C.) All of the above.
BLAGO: I'm clean Rahm, you know this. You think that fucking Fitzgerald would being twiddling his fucking thumbs if he had shit to go on?
EMANUEL: I gotta go, Gov. You appoint who you want, we really don't give a shit.
BLAGO: What if I appoint Valerie, what if she takes it?
EMANUEL: What do you want me to say? We'd appreciate it, I'm not gonna fucking kiss your ring over it.
BLAGO: "Appreciate it"? Come on, this is a senate seat we're talking about. It's worth a fuck of a lot more than appreciation.
EMANUEL: You asked us for a list, we gave you a fucking list, you want to make your own list then make your own fucking list. [Raising voice] But if you're asking for anything else from me, or Barack, or Valerie, then you can fucking stop talking right now Rod.
BLAGO: Wait a sec there Rahm. Wait just a fucking minute. Who are you to talk to me like that? I fucking made you.
EMANUEL: You made me? You made me? Tell me you're fucking joking.
BLAGO: No no no, you listen to me shit-face.. You see this list I got, the names motherfucking Obama fucking wants for the Senate. I just ripped it in two. How you like that? Oops, Harris just dropped it in the shredder. Harris?
HARRIS (muffled): Yes sir?
BLAGO: Did you just drop that list in the shredder? [Whirring, shredder noise]
HARRIS (muffled): I did.
EMANUEL: Do you have me on fucking speakerphone?
BLAGO: It's in the shredder, Rahm. The list is bye bye.
EMANUEL: Hold on a sec -- you got me on fucking speakerphone? Who the fuck do you think I am?
BLAGO: Who are you Rahm? Who are you? You're shit, you hear me? Don't come back to Chicago Rahm, it's not your town any more.
EMANUEL: Pick up the phone Rod.
BLAGO: I'll put someone in the senate who will fucking fuck you. I might even put myself in there, how you like that Rahm? How you gonna explain that to fucking Barack, every time he's gotta call me up for my fucking vote. He'd have to take my calls then, wouldn't he?
EMANUEL: [Screaming] I said pick up the FUCKING phone!
BLAGO: [Picks up phone, speakerphone off] I got your attention now, didn't I?
EMANUEL: Shut the fuck up and listen to me for one second Rod. And I want you to listen carefully, because this is the last time I'm ever going to talk to you. You are fucking dead to me. You been fucking dead to Barack since '06, now you're dead to me. Know what that means? That means you're dead to my people in Chicago, Daley on down, and all these friends you think you have aren't gonna touch you with a ten foot fucking pole.
BLAGO: Oh now you're the fucking Godfather? Fuck you.
EMANUEL: No fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.
BLAGO: Fuck you!
EMANUEL: Listen up asshole. The shit's gonna hit the fan, maybe tomorrow, maybe next month, and when Fitz finally brings down the hammer it's gonna be my name that's going through your head. You won't know the hows or the fucking whys, but it's gonna have my fucking fingerprints all over it. Have a great life fatso.
BLAGO: Hey fuck--
EMANUEL: [Click.] End of conversation End transcript.

[Update] From ABC News < ge=1> :

U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald says there is "nothing in the complaint" that implicates President-elect Obama but the affidavit suggests someone from the Obama camp was in touch with Blagojevich or his aides, if only to tell the Governor that Obama would not offer anything but "appreciation" in exchange for the Senate appointment..

Update: This is in fact a spoof by one of the Dailykos writers. I may not like them but I do give credit where it is due. Well done. You've fooled a lot of people. The funny thing is, it is totally believable.

Friday, January 2, 2009

Leasing versus Purchasing

Perhaps the best explanation of how leasing makes more sense than purchasing that I have ever seen.

The math on the Paul McCartney-Heather Mills divorce is as follows:

After 5 years of marriage, he paid her $49 million. Assuming he got sex every night during their 5 year relationship it ended up costing him $26,849 each time.
This is Heather.

Leasing On the other hand, New York Governor Elliot Spitzer's favorite call girl Kristen ( Ashley Dupre ), who is an absolute stunner. Only charges $4,000.00 an hour...for anything!
This is Kristen.

Had Paul McCartney "employed" Kristen for 5 years, he would have paid $7.3 million for an hour of sex every night for 5 years (a $41.7 million savings). Value-added benefits are: a 22 year old hot babe, no begging, no coaxing, never a headache, plays all requests, no bitching and complaining or 'honey-do' lists. Best of all, she leaves when you're done, and comes back when asked. All at 1/7th the cost, and no legal fees.

Sometimes leasing makes much more sense.